Tamara
Posted by ulla on Saturday, February 28, 2009
Under: Lesbian
Name or Nick Name : Tamara, ThatGayGirlTamara
Country or City you are from: : Florida
Your Age : 29
Your Gender : female
What did you come out as? : Lesbian
What other words would you use to describe yourself? : funny, eclectic, unapologetic, christian.
How old were you when you first realised your identity? : 17
How old were you when you first told someone? : 20
Did you plan it? If so, how? : I didn't plan it. My ex-boyfriend kept pressuring me for sex and I couldn't take it any longer.
What made you choose that person to tell? : The situation chose me. I didn't want to have sex with him and no wasn't cutting it for him. He thought it was the size of his penis. It was actually the fact that he had a penis.
Can you remember exactly what you said? : I said, "It doesn't have anything to do with the size of your penis. I like girls."
How did you feel? : Relieved
What was the person’s reaction? : shock
What did they say? : Wow!
What was your relationship with the person like afterwards? : We talked every now and then.
What’s it like now? : My mom was trying to hook us up.
Since coming out how out are you at school? : not_applicable
Since coming out, how “out” are you at work? : only_friends
Since coming out, how “out” are you with family? : all_out
Since coming out, how “out” are you with your friends? : all_out
What does being out mean to you? : I don't hide my relationship.
What differences, if any, did your cultural background make to your experience of coming out? : I don't think it had any difference. My family had a hard time accepting it, but doesn't every family? I don't think acceptance is the normal response.
What does the concept of the closet mean to you? : Leading a double life. Relationships are a big part of who we are. Some people say being gay doesn't matter because it's just sex...but come one. Relationships include sex, but they are not exclusively sex...it's all the other stuff. That's what makes it a closet. You hide all of the aspects of the relationship to hide the sex.
What advice would you give someone wanting to come out? : Just do it. The torture you inflict on yourself is far worse than anything other people could say to you. Be prepared for disappointment, but eventually, everyone will come around.
If you could do it all again, would you do it any differently? If so, how? : Yes. I would've never had relationships with boys. It just made people in my family believe that I could have a serious long term relationship with a guy and my lesbianism was a phase. And I would've come out all at once instead of bit by bit.
Country or City you are from: : Florida
Your Age : 29
Your Gender : female
What did you come out as? : Lesbian
What other words would you use to describe yourself? : funny, eclectic, unapologetic, christian.
How old were you when you first realised your identity? : 17
How old were you when you first told someone? : 20
Did you plan it? If so, how? : I didn't plan it. My ex-boyfriend kept pressuring me for sex and I couldn't take it any longer.
What made you choose that person to tell? : The situation chose me. I didn't want to have sex with him and no wasn't cutting it for him. He thought it was the size of his penis. It was actually the fact that he had a penis.
Can you remember exactly what you said? : I said, "It doesn't have anything to do with the size of your penis. I like girls."
How did you feel? : Relieved
What was the person’s reaction? : shock
What did they say? : Wow!
What was your relationship with the person like afterwards? : We talked every now and then.
What’s it like now? : My mom was trying to hook us up.
Since coming out how out are you at school? : not_applicable
Since coming out, how “out” are you at work? : only_friends
Since coming out, how “out” are you with family? : all_out
Since coming out, how “out” are you with your friends? : all_out
What does being out mean to you? : I don't hide my relationship.
What differences, if any, did your cultural background make to your experience of coming out? : I don't think it had any difference. My family had a hard time accepting it, but doesn't every family? I don't think acceptance is the normal response.
What does the concept of the closet mean to you? : Leading a double life. Relationships are a big part of who we are. Some people say being gay doesn't matter because it's just sex...but come one. Relationships include sex, but they are not exclusively sex...it's all the other stuff. That's what makes it a closet. You hide all of the aspects of the relationship to hide the sex.
What advice would you give someone wanting to come out? : Just do it. The torture you inflict on yourself is far worse than anything other people could say to you. Be prepared for disappointment, but eventually, everyone will come around.
If you could do it all again, would you do it any differently? If so, how? : Yes. I would've never had relationships with boys. It just made people in my family believe that I could have a serious long term relationship with a guy and my lesbianism was a phase. And I would've come out all at once instead of bit by bit.
In : Lesbian
