James

Coming out is hard to do ... and there are some amazing stories collected here, from all walks of life, all over Earth. Please consider sharing your story, whether you came out yourself, or somebody else came out to you. For both interviews, there's a standard set of questions plus plenty of space for you to add anything you like, just use either of the aforementioned links - thanks. The interviews are published here and on a South African LGBTQI portal called QueerLife - big ups to them for hosting the online form and supporting the project - don't forget to visit them and see your story there.

James

Posted by ulla on Friday, February 27, 2009 Under: Gay

Country & city: Fort Lauderdale, Florida USA
Name/nickname: James
Age: 38
Gender: Male
What did you come out as (gay, bi, transgendered, use any terms you like here)? Gay
What other words would you use to describe yourself? Passionate
How old were you when you first realized your identity? 16
How old were you when you first told someone? 21
Did you plan it? If so, how? No
What made you choose that person to tell? Alcohol
Can you remember exactly what you said? “I think I’m Gay”
How did you feel? Very Odd
What was the person’s reaction? Laughter
What did they say? Yeah Right
What was your relationship with the person like afterwards? Good Friends
What’s it like now? Still Friends
If you’ve been outed unwillingly, who did it? Yes, at work, a very bitter female co-worker
What happened? I was fired
What were peoples’ reactions? I have no idea, I wasn’t around to see it.
If you’ve experienced homophobia etc, please give an example. I was fired for being gay
Since coming out, how “out” are you in the following areas of your life:
Educational institution: Master’s Degree Florida International University
Job: Great Job
Family: Love them dearly
Friends: Part of my family too
What does being out mean to you? Being who I am
What differences, if any, did your cultural background make to your experience of coming out? Some accepted it, some didn’t, those who didn’t aren’t part of my life anymore.
What does the concept of the closet mean to you? Hiding out…..lots of scary monsters in the closet.
What advice would you give someone wanting to come out? Make sure you have a support group and can financially support yourself first.
If you could do it all again, would you do it any differently? If so, how? If I could do it again, being gay would be accepted and not an issue, so I wouldn’t have to “come out”