(orig. published by MambaGirl.com)

Seduction doesn’t need to be about flowers, candlelight and sleazy, cheesy music. Not that any of those things are intrinsically bad, just a little trite in that context.

Despite the gentle persuasion and arousal involved, it doesn’t work without tacit permission from whomever you’re trying to seduce either. It doesn’t need to be planned. It doesn’t need to be “performed” by only one of the people involved.

The first step in seduction would be to stop thinking in stages. Rather see it as a sensual journey that won’t require a clear beginning or end point.

Years ago, a (straight) glossy women’s magazine claimed that women primarily need warmth to get into the mood. For men it was “breathing” or something. It makes sense though, doesn’t it? Clearly this rule does not apply to heat waves.

Comfortable temperature, comfortable environment … and almost any environment will do, as long as you can tell a story about it and make it look beautiful to her. Being able to find enchantment in unexpected places is probably quite seductive in itself, at least to those with imagination.

It sounds a little contrived, but if you’re going to play music, play what she likes, not what you like. Those two things may or may not coincide, but if she’s a Britney fan, what are you doing with her anyway?

Alcohol can be almost as effective a lubricant as lube, but if you rely on getting someone drunk to bed them, you’ll never ever be sure whether she slept with you because she liked you, or just because she was drunk. Plus, things blur in alcoholic hazes. The aspect of drinking that is more seductive than the effect of alcohol, is the care you take in choosing something she likes to drink, whether it’s alcoholic or not. It’s part of being attentive too, keeping her glass filled.

Laughter might seem like a strange tactic, but if you make her laugh, she’ll probably like you. If you make her laugh enough to lose some inhibitions and feel truly comfortable with you, she might even lose a few more inhibitions in the process.

Pretend that the moment is going to last forever. Use all of your senses and enjoy everything slowly (at least initially). Pretend that she is the only and most desirable human on the planet; it should feel that way anyhow. Nothing should matter more than her feelings in that moment. If things are going well, you’ll both end up blessed out, languid and the pleasure will heighten. A good seduction is a space to get lost in, to drift along with, a place where time really does seem to stand still.

Seduction. Arousal. Foreplay. Those three terms could be considered synonyms in many ways. Apart from the usual conclusion, it’s also a rather delicious way of telling your lover just how sexy you find her.

If none of the above works, give up. Begging isn’t sexy. Not that kind anyway.