Showing category "dyke dating rituals" (Show all posts)

Give me a ring sometime ...

Posted by ulla on Sunday, August 30, 2009, In : dyke dating rituals

"I hate the term commitment rings," she said - and I pondered it a bit. If it isn't an engagement ring, or a wedding ring, but it is a symbol of love and commitment, what else is one supposed to call it?

Then of course, there is our communal queer history of concepts like engagement and marriage representing things we were not allowed to do by law. And so what we could do, was commit verbally, in front of our friends, any family who hadn't disowned us and our cats. We could get Wiccan and c...

What's more serious? Swine flu or girlfriends?

Posted by ulla on Sunday, July 19, 2009, In : dyke dating rituals

I took that photo in East London the other day, sniggering. I wondered which headline would scare South African lesbians most; swine flu or being haunted by girlfriends? On the whole, I think I'd rather have the swine flu, thank you. That said, most of my excess of exes seem to be delightfully benign these days and I am certainly not stalking any old flames myself, so perhaps I am immune, for now at least.

Why is it that great friendships are so very simple and comfortable, but girlfriend...

The Joys of Lesbianism

Posted by ulla on Tuesday, March 24, 2009, In : dyke dating rituals

I write a whole heap of stuff taking the piss out of us, the lesbian community and a whole heap about the stereotypes – but it occurred to me that I don't write so much about the good stuff. And there is so much good stuff.

Do you remember when you first worked out you were a lesbian? Maybe the best part is the first time you do something about it … wasn't that experience just like coming home? Suddenly the jigsaw's all together perfectly, making the most beautiful image.

How about falli...

A Dyke Night Out

Posted by ulla on Monday, February 23, 2009, In : dyke dating rituals

Alright, so you've caught your lesbian. Now what are you going to do with her? If I know dykes, the first date might very well be a negotiation of romance followed by sex followed by discussion of childhood traumas, all preparatory to that tired old joke about moving in together on the second date. Try not to sleep with her on the first date - unless you really want to.

By the time you've got to know her online you've probably been doing some fairly heavy duty seduction - as delicious as th...

First, catch your lesbian ...

Posted by ulla on Monday, February 23, 2009, In : dyke dating rituals

So you're no longer a twentysomething nightclubber how do you meet single lesbians? If you live in a major city there are probably a few groups you can join and dinners to go to and (even in this day and age) the good ole lesbo potluck from time to time. What i'm thinking of now though, is that wider-choice, higher-risk option; the internet.

There are local and international paysites: qwomen, gwomen, Playdate etc. These cajole you in saying sign-up is free. It is, but you can't actually com...

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All over the internet ... like Marmite. Only tastier.

www.hypertopia.org

stuffdykeslike.blogspot.com

iDyke

Ulla Kelly

Eastern Cape, South Africa

Weekly columnist for Q back when it was owned by the Mail & Guardian, regular columnist for Queerlife in 2008, as well as contributing to MambaGirl, Cherrygrrl, Gayspeak and other websites, I decided it was about time I collected it all in one place, so I can see what I've done and hopefully keep doing new stuff.