I've decided to stop being quite such a gloomy sod and count some blessings for a change.  Good things I've thought of recently as far as the dyke community goes, are Ellen Degeneres' seemingly never-ending and meteoric rise to fame – her own talk show, judge on American Idols, Cover Girl contract – and this is the woman who got married to a woman in a dress, while wearing a suit.  Then there's Kate Clinton.  OK she's not overly well-known in South Africa, but in 2006 she celebrated her 25th year in the comedy industry – and for a very out, proud and political “stylish butch” to make it in showbiz for so long – something, somewhere must be going right.  So Ellen and Kate are currently my two … not role models, I am in no danger of fame, but signs of good things for dykes.  They're ambassadors, I guess.

They do it in two completely different ways too.  No, not that “it” - pull your minds out of your pants please.  The ambassador bit.  Kate Clinton is unfailingly out and very loud and proud indeed – possibly as a result of this, her appeal's more limited to the dyke community than Ellen's is.  Ellen is everybody's.  Her high-profile and good looking femme girlfriends have possibly helped broaden her appeal there – because actually she and Clinton both have a similar wide-grin positive kind of an approach to things. 

The fact remains, Ellen never denies being gay and when it matters, (like Prop 8 issues) she talks about it, it's just not her entire “schtick.”

As for Kate, she's something of an elderdyke now and perhaps Rachel Maddow owes a little of her current success to the trails that Kate blazed, back in the proverbial day.  She's there behind Ellen too, in that line of brave lesbians who started off doing standup.

2010 has just emerged, foetus-like from the bloody hips of 2009 and surely South Africa is thinking about things beyond soccer?  And us queers, where are we? 

Well, I'm guessing most of us are still in closets.  Iconic lesbian website After Ellen's round up of lesbians who came out in 2009 includes a whole one South African i.e. Melanie Lowe.  Whether or not you like her music, if you're one of those fabled and privileged queers with plenty of disposable income, please go buy at least one of ...

“Madonna, Lover, and Son” by Becki Jayne Harrelson, 1996. Oil on canvas, 80 x 68 inches. www.beckijayne.com

So, besides yelling, "Ho, ho, ho!" at your exes, what are you doing to dyke the halls and have yourself a lesbo little Christmas?  If you're lucky, you have some form of well-adjusted family and can integrate into the general Christmas spirit without feeling the need to make it too queer - it's not always that way though, is it?  For some, Christmas ends up being one of those times w...

For the first and possibly last time in my life, I bought a copy of Rooi Rose (for any non South African readers, it’s an Afrikaans women’s magazine and although it’s come a long way since apartheid days, it’s still one of those magazines that one thinks of as safely mainstream i.e. hardly relevant to me, as part of the LGBTQI spectrum).  I bought it for the story about Robert Hamblin, the artist formerly known as Adele Hamblin; photographer extraordinaire.

Robert’s physical transiti...

Both in and out of the lesbian community, butch lesbians take the most flak.  We're the most easily identified of the species and so right from the get go, we're on the firing line.  We are also constantly accused of "wanting to be men."  Now that's complete nonsense right from the start, because a woman who wants to be a man is called transgendered and within that, may be any sexuality on the spectrum.  If you're going to insist upon adhering to society's expectations and definitions, then y...

There are people in my life and on the periphery of it, who will never ever truly accept me, because I am queer.  Sure, some people have altered their thinking enough to embrace me without saying, "If only ..." but at least one close family member, some friends and a whole bunch more acquaintances do their best not to be homophobic, but are nonetheless.  It's probably painful on both sides and I have grown past that youthful fervour that is convinced that some form of universal justice will p...

So I went to Joburg Pride this year - yay me!  Is there anything better than thousands of queers all together?  Alright, that probably sounds a bit separatist, but hey, it's really nice not to be outnumbered for once.  The sun was out and so were we - most of the boys looking fabulous and most of us lesbians looking ... well, wearing jeans and t-shirts really; myself included.  I contemplated a pink grim reaper outfit, but just didn't get it together.  Anyway, my girlfriend I scored QueerLife...

Driving through the city the other day, one of the newspaper headline posters yelled, "TV'S GAY KISS!" from the side of the road.  My rantometer just blew up instantly.  It's not as if it was the first such headline, it certainly won't be the last.  Every time there's a gay kiss on TV (here and in the UK, at least), the media has a field day.

Why?

Gay marriage is legal now.  And surely it isn't news that queers kiss?  Well obviously it is.  For all the irritating heterosexuals who go around pon...